Friday, July 31, 2009
whoo hoo. nice old movies, nice old soundtracks, absolutely sweetness.
i feel very bi-polar now. hahaha!
hmm... i wanna buy new games.
cant' wait for holidays to come.
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Goodbye Dear Cousin Chong Hao,
i've known you ever since i was born literately, but not figuratively. i never had a proper conversation with you, the last time i remembered talking to you was a phone call to ask about something medical. since then, i never saw you, until today, but i doubt you even know i was at your bed, chanting sutras together with your friends, sending you on your last journey.
since young i've followed your footsteps silently. my mum sang praises of you, quoted you, used you as an example every time i deviated from the right path by a little. you were a role model, a goal, and a competitor to me.
but from some time onwards, i realise that i do not have the same capabilities as you, perhaps due to the environment in which we grew up and people we meet, i fell short of your path, while you continued to climb the ladder of your chosen path, and earned your title of a Dr, literately and figuratively, someone who does save lives, and attained the highest order of education.
to a person who deviated from the 'right' path, as pre-determined by our parents, i decided not to follow your path anymore, both because of self and environmental issues, as a result, academically, i did not attained the goals that you did. musically, i tried, failed, but attained something that i thought was worthy to be equated to your accomplishment.
i remembered there was a period of time my mum tried to convince you of finding a partner, and you politely tried to counter-convince my mum and your mum. at that time you were already climbing a ladder many young aspiring singaporeans dream of. i remembered meeting you twice outside, a comical incident at the hospital, and another on the bus. both were mid-day, and you told me and my mum you just knocked off from work ever since the morning the day before. at that point i remembered telling my mum that if it were me, i would have died from such heavy work. but to you, it was a fulfilling and gratifying career.
and despite the heavy workload and busy schedule, you still found time to see the world. you visited places of breath-taking beauty, rich cultural heritage, and seen things most people have never seen. you appreciated the beauty which many of us did not. i'm reminded of this small little question and answer session i had during one our relative's wedding, you were explaining many different cultural significance of the architecture and sculptures in india, on one of your trips. i was amazed that you could remember all of what you found out. and once again, i had the urge to walk your path again.
i remembered again, that you were working at the ICU during the SARS outbreak. at that time, i accompanied my mum folding countless paper cranes as a gesture to support you. but unfortunately it never reached your hands. till this day, i kept questioning, what would be your reaction when you received those cranes? would our relationship as cousins, son and daughter of very close sisters improve? the answer wouldn't come, not anymore.
i was happy for you, when i got news of you having found a partner, and i truly thought it was a good match. and yet, during the many meetings, be it with my parents or with me, we never spoke. i tried to, but it was cut off, or ignored. at that time i wasn't happy about it, and perhaps complained to my mum, if memory serves.
nevertheless, i still supported you on your career, be happy for you for your wedding, continued to envy your priceless experiences, and strived to walk that path of yours. you never know these things, i doubt you did, and never will.
the previous time i saw you, you were on cloud nine, blissfully holding the woman of your dreams with a bright new life ahead of you. and yet, the next time i saw you, you were on your deathbed, oblivious to all around you. even though i have no memory of times spent with you, but you were a role model that i looked up to. hence i did what i could at the time, chanting the sutras which you have taken effort to undertand to you with your friends, who stood by you right till the end.
you have wonderful friends. friends of all ages and sizes. friends who took the liberty of taking leaves, staying by your side, finding help, and recited pages of mantra, sutras, meditations over and over again since god knows what time since morning to ease your sufferings. and from what your friends recited together with the sutras and mantra, your contributions and merits this lifetime, i can't help but being reminded of the path you took once again. and as i chanted together with them, i realise, that path was right in front of me, just one step away.
right now as i'm typing this, i'm fighting back the tears i swore not to shed before arriving at your house today, the tears i fought back when i saw your family's tear-washed eyes and faces, the tears i fought back as i listened to your contributions and merits. because i remembered someone once told me, that the amount of tears you shed for someone before or after death, will equate to the amount of unwillingness and resistance of that someone to pass on peacefully. for you, it will be to be with Buddha, and the various Bodhisattvas you based your learnings from.
i hope that you'll find your place in the afterlife, hopefully it is as said, with Buddha and the various Bodhisattvas, or a good next life, if you believed in reincarnation. and i will continue to strive for your path, look up to you as a role model, a goal, and a competitor.
with that,
Goodbye Dear Cousin Chong Hao.
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Friday, July 24, 2009
紧急呼叫露其亚二嫂，恋次二哥，修兵堂哥，卯之花姑姑，勇音堂妹！
白哉大哥有事了！！ 有人要抢走大哥！！
緋真大嫂，你在天之灵要保佑大哥，还有我们！！ .~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
i just got reminded why we
hate summer sememsters so much...
exactly two weeks from now (now meaning mid terms for coms441), is the final exam...
within 2 weeks, minus 4 days we are supposed to finish 8 chapters... and for me one presentation and paper...
exactly 2 weeks and 2 days from now (now meaning quiz 2 for psy 333) is yet another final exam.
and for her i have absolutely no idea what the hell is she going to test, since she pretty much likes to digress during lectures, and jump about the chapters like fleas...
each constitutes 25% and 20% of the overall grade respectively...
do i get a moment to catch my breath?
summer semester is supposed to be a bloody holiday. and yet for us it has turned into the worst nightmare of the year.
thanks to whoever is the gigantic big mouth who decided that UB program constitutes of a summer semester of only 13 weeks! you are greatly
NOT appreciated.
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Sunday, July 19, 2009
ok i figured out the gigantic problem already.
i need a balance of school work, anime, manga, movies, and outings.
either one of those is missing, i'll crumble.
elaboration:
during holidays with no school work, it's a bore everyday because every day is the same, no goals, nothing. so, no school work, not a good thing.
during school days, no anime since i gave up some lengthy grandma story, becomes boring because everyday is about nonsensical stuff like motivation at work, public relations, evaluation. too much school work, not a good thing either. anime stimulates because of the action, voice (very important) and visual.
during all times, no manga, ultimate bad. it's like no snacks in your day! that's gross! i need breaks, little stories that inspire, brightens and warms the heart! no manga, absolutely bad!
during all times, no movies, omg this is what you call world crumbling down. movies tells little stories on the move, with visual, audio, action, everything thrown in! without it i'm dead!
during all times, no outings, omg worse. where's my dosage of happiness and laughter? i'm worse off than those living in the mountains pls...
yep, that's the major problem of my life. spelt out in full. and do i get a fufillment of it? i doubt so.
balance? tipped heavily on the 'danger' side.
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Saturday, July 18, 2009
i don't like to be told what to do. because it makes me feel like i'm living my life for someone else.
and sometimes there are things that i've tried, whether subtly or outright, and after so many tries, i've given up. which means whatever comes, i don't give a damn about it anymore. i gave up, means i won't try anymore. i'll still hold grudges, but i don't care. because i know the same cycle will come again, and in the end i'll be standing at square one, with absolutely nothing at all.
lessons learnt are meant to be applied. which applies to things such as getting nothing out of something.
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Thursday, July 16, 2009
you'll be surprised at how much you know that other people don't, when you talk to people you haven't talked to before... even if they seem much more knowledgable then you... (haha...)
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
名：雷瀛
年：20
特征：耳机，漫画
今天终于克制不了诱惑，买了三本漫画。
漫画果然是要拿在手里才痛快！
早上有人说我终于回来了，我还真不信。不过当我打开漫画，闻到那股新书呛鼻的味道时，我才真的意识到，我真的回来了。
好久没一股想要写作的冲动了。没想到让我重返‘江湖’的会是那套漫画，真的做梦也没想到。哈哈。
结果真的在课堂上，一边用手机查字，一边装着听课抄笔记地写作，但也没什么进展，毕竟真正的故事情节已经让我用了三天两夜的时间想烂了。哈哈！！
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Monday, July 13, 2009
昨晚差点就真的笑死了。
多谢漫画的 drama CD. 也是费了一番苦心才下载完。（我看我真的跟下载没缘。。。）
看了声优名单，整个脸马上立刻跨下来。
那只变态老狐狸的声优竟然声音那么糟！！ 亏他还是我堂哥！！
伊恩也好不到哪里去。。。 不该录的声音也录了进去。。。 （死亡原因之一）
不过凯薾和李隆基就还好吧。。。 两个真有够甜的。（死亡原因之二）
听到最后，为什么没了！！！！ 李和凯薾的下半段呢！！！！ （死亡原因之三）
好了不要说了，已经死了三次了，在听下去真的会被感动死。。。
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Saturday, July 11, 2009
哇撑死了，老妈买了那么多东西。
呵呵，昨天真是开心死了。前两天一时心血来潮想找漫画看，突然想到以前看过的一系列BL 漫画，马上找。在线的都不能看，卡死了！！！·#￥%*# 唉正当我打算放弃，啊哈！有的下载。不过也是个麻烦到要死的下载方式。费了两天的时间，两天！！！！ 终于得到手了。哇塞还是续集的。这下有的看了！耶！
啊哈，熟悉的面孔出现了。好色奸诈的老狐狸浅葱，和他随身不离的伊恩。哈哈算是漫画里两个我看得最有头的一对，伊恩也就算了，只是一直都不明白浅葱看好伊恩哪里。样貌? 两个都帅，不算。随便啦。不过就是伊恩的不安，浅葱的威武，所以才那么感人。
浅葱万岁！！！！ 欢迎来到我的漫画家族！！从昨天你就是我的堂哥了！娃哈哈哈！！！
不过半途杀出又一对，李隆基和凯爾。阿阿阿啊!!!!! 太可爱了!!!!!!!!!!! 哈哈，李隆基实在是太太太太太可爱了哈哈！！！！人也帅，真的是 omg!!!!!!
夜深人静，看漫画是真的很开心，只是不能大笑。。。要不然老妈会来砍人。。。
不过真的很温馨，这漫画里的对对角色都让人时笑时哭。有时就真的让我笑到差点死掉。（笑到椅子突然往后翻，差点跌死）不过真的很好看！！！！ 虽然多半时候都是‘不能放映’的画面，但因为剧情的发展，两人如何面对困难与彼此的感情。。 不过真的是因为很好笑。。 哈哈。
耶！今天也有漫画可以看，追随多年的老伙伴们，今天雷瀛又来看你们了！
（用华文打字真的很慢很麻烦。。。亏我现在还在腰酸背痛。。。昨天打拳打过头了）
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
hum ji right. see me nia, quickly zao right?
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
been complaining alot lately, but i think i ought to give gratitude to some things despite my down turn of luck
1. thanks for the wii
2. thanks for the help for my psp
3. thanks for the laughter you guys bought to me
4. thanks for the friends who stuck with me
5. thanks for the listening ear for the things i bitch about
6. thanks for the support i got
7. thanks for the concern that i received
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Monday, July 6, 2009
long time no blog, update abit...
1. fell down in exam hall that day, scraped my knee, sorta bruised it (hope it's not injury), bleeded 1 drop of blood, suffered er... a few days of restricted movement and pain.
2. got jabbed and nagged by mum who is convinced that something is wrong with me and by the doctor. thanks for the injection that gave me a tiny cramp on my arm. and stop telling me what i am. i know, and i'm working on it.
3. bought the all awaited Wii!!!!!!!!! i still remember the commercial "Wii would like to play". 1 day of pricing comparision, almost died. sibei tulan. (pardon my swearing), but you two shops, i swear i'll never go in to ask for anything unless i have no other choice, or i'm going in to mock the hell out of you. i'm a girl so what? doesn't mean i don't play games. what kind of bloody attitude is that?! you just wait. don't think i'm a girl i won't fight back. dare me and i'll fight it all out right in the middle of Sim Lim Square until you close shop. other than that, psycho-ed by uncle to buy WiiFit, took me 3 hours to set it up, and played until i was total shag. and it is really shag, playing whatever games. i think the real reason why i was so tired, is because i laughed too much... not cos of playing, but of the laughter... (can burn fats/carbs/calories right?) but it's fun. if only i didn't have that scrapped knees... come come and play with me!!!
4. someone stepped out, but someone came in to stand in for that person to irritate the bloody hell out of me. did you get this person to sub for you?! you have nothing better to do isit?! and you! have officially stepped on my bloody toes. you just wait. someday, you'll regret what you've done.
5. i have 4 husbands, 1 kor, 1 kor kor, 1 sister-in-law, 1 uncle, 1 cousin. but i still can't stand monochrome factor... despite i love that voice... my gawd... that heart/body-melting voice... awwwwwwwwwww
6. apparently i'm not the only one who saw what happened. it's somehow a good thing...
7. discovered some things which i only thought of it now, and found some answers which didn't answer any questions at all. (waste my time)
8. been eating less significantly these days. been out of schedule these days.
9. have been wasting money like turning on running water... gotta save up... for iphone...
10. many friends coming to SIM! YAY!!!!!! ehem. 4th aug, lunch is on you Mr. Kimidamaru88 and don't act blur and 'huh' me thanks.
11. glad that i was of help to someone despite my own inexperience.
12. feeling more confident bit by bit.
13. ok getting crappier and crappier haha, let's stop.
but in a nutshell, my friends, no worries. any length, i'll be there (except if you throw my wii controller out of my window you'll pay for it. other than that, anything, you know which number you can call)
those who stepped on my toes, don't worry, your turn will come soon. but that time i'll see if i can break your leg or something.
officially black-listed people, have fun wasting your life away while i watch with popcorn and a nice big couch.
those who can't do/act as they say/believe/promise, please do yourself a favor and do what's right, whether by disappearing or changing.
and to my stuffies, thanks for your presence.
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Saturday, July 4, 2009
OMG!!!!!!!! VIZARDS!!!! YOU ARE BACK!!!!!!!! WHOO HOO!!!!!!
you certainly made my day!!!!!!!!!!!
JYJYJYJYJYJYJYJY!!!!!!! I'LL BE ROOTING FOR YOU GUYS!!!!!
Shinji
Hiyori
Rose
Love
Mashiro
Hacchi
Kensei
Lisa
GAMBATTE!!!!!!
Urahara! Yoruichi! and that square glasses guy!!!! WHERE ARE YOU !!! COME OUT AND HELP!
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
Friday, July 3, 2009
i would use this quote that i was refraining myself from using for a very long time...
风往哪里吹就往哪里飘
this phrase was used by someone i don't wish to bring up unless it is for a confrontation, but now i can't find a better phrase, but to use it.
just watched MI trilogy, (i know i'm slow), and the phrase:
and i think, skydiving would be so much more interesting than branch/vine swinging.
.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:
