Sunday, January 25, 2009


a special occasion brought me to ransack my room, and coincidence led me to uncover something that i kept for quite some time already.

wishes from friends, teachers, juniors blah blah blah for many occasions. and i think, i ought to bring them out and look at them once in a while or so.

each brought back memories from long time ago, not so long ago, and times which i already forgotten they actually exists.

for the past few days, i'm rather sick... down with unexplained physical discomfort, but i still managed to keep myself alive, in one piece, to do what i need to do.

other than physical discomfort, emotionally and psychologically, sadly, i'm inflicted, with perceived and non-perceived pain and hurt. yes, i'll recover, and recovering quick. but there are times, where unfortunate and unforseeable circumstances which have nothing whatsoever to do with me, brings back the pain, and i feel my eyes tearing. and then when it's really unbearable, i'll tear myself away and retreat to my own sanctury and lick my wounds.

but like they say, you bear your own wounds. and that's what i'm going to do.

.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:

Friday, January 23, 2009


it's been a loooooooong time since i blogged... the last post i typed was something not very nice. and the previous one was for, god's sake, school...

some people progress, some regress, others? Digress...

Quoted from SATC:

"Good guys screw you, Bad guys screw you, and the others don't know how to screw you."

whahahahahaha!!!!! that cracked me up really badly at 3am in the morning some day i can't rembember when.

Quoted from SATC also:

"you can't stop being who you are just because you are afraid"

yep, up till this point i think i don't know who i am anymore. i think my character and personality twisted rather badly these days...

Quoted from Evan Almighty:

"if someone prays for patience, do you think God gives him patience? or does He give him the opportunity to be patient? if someone prays for courage, does God gives him courage? or does He give him to opportunity to be courageous?"

another contradiction when it comes to searching for the ultimate truth... how do we know when is the opportunity for what we want? and even if we grab it, does it manifest into what we want? or does it leave you disappointed when all else fail?

theraputic these movies are... SATC, the holiday, iron man, evan almighty... should just bury myself somewhere and have a movie marathon...

something Steffi said that i found really funny.

"no, i don't need to look at her eyeballs, but i have to see bob for his armstrong."

WHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!! if only posts can insert actions, else that scene is enough to make the earth shake with laughter.

if only recovering was as simple as that horrible woman till this day i still hate her but love her skills when she shouts:

"Soten kisshun, watashi wa kyozetsu suru!"

if only severing was as simple as the same horrible woman when she shouts:

"Koten zansshun, watashi wa kyozetsu suru!"

if only protection was as simple as still the same horrible woman when she shouts:

"Santen kesshun, watashi wa kyozetsu suru!"

Quoted from Batman Begins:

"Why do we fall? It is so that we can learn to pick ourselves up."

i love glacier.

i'm grateful for everything that happened in my life.

and i love myself, so that i will know how to love others.

.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:

Saturday, January 17, 2009


i hate to be tormented. and i realise every measure i've taken, seem to fail in the end when i finally comprehended the phrase 'it takes two hands to clap'. and i realise, this past week, i've wasted my energy banging into walls, knocking into people, thinking, hiding, changing my perspectives, blah blah blah

in the end, i'm back to square one with 'i don't know what to do' mentality.

Glacier, you are one solace that i have at the darkest hours of the night, even when all seem bleak, you still smile with innocent eyes hoping to bring comfort.

i'm glad i bought that polar bear.

.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:

Sunday, January 11, 2009

痛い、君の詞、まるで刀の傷

嫌い、君の詞、けきょく君のこたぃえわいない

好き、君のたいどう

でもほんとにありがとう

せめて、ちょとだけ、私に好き、嬉です

よければ、こんなじょたいツズケテでいい。

だから、君わ私、好きの人。

自分の傷、自分で受けて

がんばってね？

私絶対君におおえんする

.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.:

Friday, January 2, 2009


another year has passed and it's now 2009.

a look back at the year, and i think, it is indeed an eventful year for many of us. for me, it was a year of learning, not just academically, but many valuable lessons in life. and as i stood at the edge of 2008, over looking all that has happened, it does seem like a roller coaster ride, to the extreme.

i realised how important sacrifices are at times of life

i saw how complicated things can become

i learnt how to grow up

i learnt how to communicate better, although not the best, but i'm trying

i understood the importance of friends

i learnt the law of attraction

i was married and divorced an anime character

i took on a Mrs. identity to prevent myself from being hurt

i discarded the Mrs. identity to try something bold and got something i couldn't handle

i fell, not exactly in love, but something similar, with someone whom i never thought i would

i saw how freaky law of attraction can be

i struggled with many things in life, academic, home, relationships, etc etc etc

i saw how a healthy person crumble

i lost count of how many times i cried, more than the previous year

i wondered about many things

i became impulsive

i was lost, and still am

i hurt many people around me

i didn't do a good job on many things

i didn't really get what i wanted with law of attraction

i was hurt, and still am

i made many mistakes

i hated myself at one point

i felt afraid and lonely

i did many things never in my whole life i would dare to

and the list goes on and on and on and i simply don't wish to continue. i just hope, i can find strength in myself once again to pick myself up at this point of time, after the hurting, the struggles, the thinking and all that stuff people go through when they are at the bottom of the pit.

indeed it was a painful year, but as they say, only when we feel pain, we'll let go and move on. and why do we fall? it is so we can learn to pick ourselves up. and i don't even know why i'm crying now.

to this person in particular, though i don't think you'll be reading this, nor you know who you are, just want to say sorry, and i didn't mean it.

.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.: