Tuesday, September 23, 2008
there's something about anime that i find it never fails to take me out of my current mood and place me in another which i will go to lengths to make sure i finish it in one sitting and literately kill any bug that interrupt me.
or maybe it's just bleach. for some reason the music it has was abstract to the extent that i can never comprehend what its melody was, but yet there's something about the soul slayers and kidous that never seem to disappoint me.
they say that we sometimes search too far for answers that are right in front of us. and i guess i was the stupid one not to realise where my call is, and where that 'home' i belong to is.
just finished Diamond Dust Rebellion, although in the end i didn't really get the whole point, but i guess being away for so long makes it a great hit to me.
i have this sudden urge to listen to all my japanese anime songs, suddenly have the urge to watch anime movies, suddenly have the urge to watch all the episodes that i've missed regardless of their trashy quality or not.
and i realise, within it there's just so many things that are worth thinking about. and i guess the primary reason why i loved them so much is because they let me live the life i want.
a life where everyone shares each others' happiness and sorrow, where there'll always be someone to watch your back, where you can wake up everyday feeling that there's a purpose in life and that you aren't worthless, and that you have the power to overcome any challenge that come your way.
and that they let me be the person i want to be.
someone who can walk the streets saying hi to people with a slap on the back and a punch in the fist, someone who laugh for all she cares with a laughing crowd, someone who can fight back an assailant with people by her side, and more importantly, someone who isn't worthless and insignificant, that people will come tell her troubles and she'll go punch that idiot in the face, and that people come to her for help which she can go all out to help.
all these while i've been wondering where Raiin went, i guess i have finally found the answer to that.
Raiin is an anime portrayal of the ideal self i want to be, naturally she lives in the virtual anime world.
the day i left that behind, was the day i left Raiin behind.
i'm glad to have found the solution of my long lost question, and to Raiin,
'i'm back'
