Monday, April 21, 2008
communication realization
as i mug into the morning, listening to songs that i've searched till i tore my hair out but still unable to find, i realise some fundamental truth that i have been blaming others but myself.
communicators are not great talkers, but
communicators are great listeners,communicators are great analyzers of situation and content of messages,communicators are convincing people who make the best out of everything they have,essentially, there are many minute things in life that requires just a step backwards, such as acknowledging that this isn't the best situation to talk, or not to stage hog, or just to think twice, or even just looking at another perspective.
there are really many others, but i guess one thing i always fail to do,
is to listen.
and shut up.
of all the times i keep saying 'i told you so' to others, to this blog, to myself, i haven't been asking this question:
"did i chose the correct time to say that?'
i know i haven't got a lot of convincing power, but as i read on, beloved textbook, i realise that, communicators all around face the same problem.
"the correct time to speak"
and
"the correct way to put across a message"
instead of trying to convincing others, letting others give themselves opinion, or just making them see the light themselves through listening, seeking clarification, asking questions, paraphrasing, might just be more effective than just telling the person what i think.
because, despite us having a high opinion of ourselves, we must also know that, receivers of our messages are also like who we are.
no one likes to be put across as stupid or dumb by not seeing the light.
neither does people want to go through a whole phase of suggesting a solution only to find that the receivers have already set their minds on another solution.
it does seem like an easy task in communicating, and that everything put across in black and white seems really simple,
but as far as i know, living for not such a long time,
19 years V.S 5 hours of reading a book
i know, all these days i've been ranting on the blog about things regarding communication,
i've been the one contributing to the breakdown.
my dad keeps telling me, the ones who are really wise aren't the ones to be telling others what ought to be, while the ones who rattle all day are the really dumb ones.
i chose to believe that, but didn't realise,
i was that rattling dumb one all along..
if only i had shut up more. 