Saturday, March 8, 2008
if there's one thing i learnt today, that is love, is a four letter word, spelt with two consonents and two vowels. and if you think the word is fantastic because it brings about wonderful things, think again. it has either unconsciously or consciously brought along a few friends which love holds by the hands, and that's hate, hardship, suffering, jealousy and sadness. and trailing behind them, is death.and i've realised how fickle-minded i am, always. by the way, credits to
Zeph, who helped me get a webbie that hosted
Zombie Powder. wondering what the hell that is, it is an earlier piece of work written by the ever genius of draggy twisty plot of
BLEACH.heard of it quite some time ago, and realised that the protagonist of the story resembles
Grimmjow a lot. both of them had similar hair, tall stature, mascular, uses 'sword', something on their cheek, and most prominent of all, both of them had a different arm, just that it's on different sides.
but the big difference is that,
Akutabi Gamma is a funny guy, who does silly things at times, caring, sweet and loving. he can crack up sometimes, but he is always putting others before him, and possess that quality that makes me like that character at first impression.
notice that i actually hated
Grimmjow Jaegerjaques at first, but for some reason 'fell in love' with him after a while...
and was reading
Zombie Powder till the wee hours of the morning before dragging myself away to finish some evaluation for school. and i realise that it's been such a long time ever since i read a manga and was laughing and 'falling in love' at the same time.
frankly, though i'll probably get shot for saying this and for being extremely ooc, but one of my 'criteria' for significant other is that he must be able to make me laugh. not by his words or whatsoever, but just those unconscious little things he does that defines who he is that makes me laugh. and now you'll proabaly be concluding that such people don't exist in real life, and i'll tell you that's the reason why i fantasise.and for some reason, i must really get credit for being a prophet since, i have the tendency to keep repeating something over and over again, and unknowingly, it'll happen in the future. and i kept emphasising that i want
'my version of Grimmjow' because in case you havent' notice, he has pretty scary eyes and loves to rip things apart... you wouldn't want him as your significant other... yeah...
and then,
Akutabi Gamma came in, just as how i wanted my
Grimmjow to be. so no i have a dillema...
Akutabi Gamma, a wanted criminal with a price of 960,000,000 nits on his head with a dumb funny face to make you laugh and caring and sweet and puts others before himselfOR
Grimmow Jaegerjaques, someone whom i shared 19 similar points, has a relatively more normal anatomy than Gamma, whose voice can easily send me walking into lamposts and lure me to sleep, and the one whom i initially 'fell in love' withbut one thing is clear.
the part about being a prophet has shed some light on this issue. whatever i wanted but never really wanted will come true. and this issue is enough to tell me that,
'my version of Grimmjow' would only appear in fantasy and not real life, just as how
Akutabi Gamma came to me.
in short. 'he' does not exist, and never will. so yes, if i have to fantasize for the rest of my life, so be it. 