well, i sit here now, with three blade cuts on my thumb, typing with an awkward pose... thanks to that razor, again. thing about sharp things is that i have a general phobia of them. don't ask me why, like i've said before, people have their fears, i have a fear of sharp things just like you are afraid of spiders or the dark. bleh.

hmm... yesterday was rather interesting, i slept until 12 again. and my dad was telling my maid to pass a message to me, and i was standing behind him. i think chief makes a good point that i'm good at stealth. surprisingly i can stand behind someone or somewhere and people can ask me 'WHOA! don't scare me! since when have you been standing there' when the gist of the convo has already been registered in my mind. or when they ask 'how did you know about that' when i was clearly somewhere near at that time and they know it. it never fails to surprise me when people say that. i consider it as a token for my trophy cabinet.

then me dad got me to go running in the evening. well, at first i was reluctant to go, simply because i haven't done proper school work since that stupid flu hit me. but then i couldn't get one page of a journal done when i belong to the clan of people who when given a chance to type on the computer we are unstoppable. which accounts for my long blog entries. and also, i remembered a promise i made to myself sometime last year. and in the end i find myself running behind my mum on her bike on the way to the park and around it. the last time i ran like a maniac was during orientation... or somewhere before when i was pressing myself to complete the 2.4 run. i told me dad, i can run fast. shuttle run or 100m dash, no problem. but don't ask me run slow or jog for a bloody distance. well, as usual, words like these don't register...

then i found myself back home in front of the com, back at the same arguement of my fortress. yep. frustrating isn't it? well, i'm just going to take a stand once and for all. the fortress in which Raiin keeps her heart, is one where she imprison herself in an icy prison, in the icy fortress, in the depths of an icy mountain. fair enough. and about the question where 'am i going to let anyone in'... hmm... i wonder. at this present stage, i'm not going to. since the fortress is built by me, and can only be destroyed by me. so without my permission, no one can enter. someone can try to break in. probably the barrier that was surrounding the fortress, but not so far as to the gates. Raiin, she has important things to deal with, so do i. and at this stage, where we have learnt a hard-learnt lesson, it's time we forgo something. besides, the fortress is the perfect test. like i've said many times to countless people, i'm not the kind who would waste time and energy for something i know wouldn't last. and the fortress is a good gauge to see if i've found it.

another thing is that, well i may be saying a lot of things to belittle myself, trample on myself or whatever you call it. horrible, unreasonable, ugly, fat, fierce, arrogant, selfish, the list just goes on and on. well i said that doing that is a way of making me strive harder for perfection. and he makes some sort of counterargument about it. well, in my defence, i find that i can be stubborn at times, but i just find that despite putting myself down so deep, i give myself credit after doing something good and the thing about it is that, after i've said such things, i leave it alone. and probably occasionally bring it up as a reminder for myself and the people around me. point is, i don't make a fuss about it. i'm lazy, sue me.

well enough of crapping. i said i'll do up a list of Seiyuus which i, um... like, or preferred. whatever. and so here it is. no order, just who comes to me at that time

-Itou Kentarou (Abarai Renji, Akimichi Chouji) - he's funny

-Yasumoto Hiroki (Sado Yasutora) - growing on me ever since i watched Soul Sonic

-Miki Shinichirou (Urahara Kisuke, Kojiro, and now that i see, Kotasu...) - amazing how one can do a rollercoaster on voice pitch and tone, especially for Kotasu.... i'll never forget this

-Fukuyama Jun (Ayasegawa Yumichika) - growing on me since Soul Sonic

-Konishi Katsuyuki (Hisagi Shuuhei, Heigani, Sabonea) - partially because of Shuuhei's character, but the roles somewhere else is really growing on me, and making me laugh

-Toochika Kouichi (Amakusa Ryu, Hyuuga Neji) - very smooth voice

-Yusa Kouji (Ichimaru Gin) - GAN!!! again, ever since Soul Sonic haha.

-Madono Mitsuaki (Seigfried, Kon) - omg. this one is a real laugh

-Hiyama Nobuyuki (Madarame Ikkaku, Datsura) - his voice is real good. and i just like ikkaku

-Okiayu Ryoutaro (Kuchiki Byakuya!!) - i think this one needs no explanation

-Suwabe Junichi (Grimjaw Jaggerjack, Atobe Keigo) - *evil laugh*

-Onosaka Masaya (Momoshiro Takeshi, Hirako Shinji) - his voice just cracks at the right time

-Seki Tomokazu (Shirahama Kenichi, Kenji) - another voice rollercoaster

-Paku Romi (Temari, Hitsugaya Toushiro) - Kakoii! i kow tow to her

-Inoue Kazuhiko (Hatake Kakashi) -pretty much self explanatory

-Morikubo Shoutaro (Nara Shikamaru, Musica) - hard to dislike this one's voice...

-Otani Ikue (Konohamaru, Pikachu) - admit it, Pikachu is as cute as its voice.

-Seki Toshihiko (Genjyo Sanzo, Umino Iruka) - agree with Zephyris, his going crazy voice...

-Hirata Hiroaki (Sha Gojyo, Genma) - well, this is my version of sexy deep tone

-Ueda Yuji (Takeshi) - more like his freak nature when he does 'takeshi'...

-Matsumoto Rika (Satoshi) - another woman power, kowtow to her for doing 10 yrs of satoshi

That's all i can think of now... and i get the feeling i'm missing out on a lot of people... but never mind.