Tuesday, September 25, 2007


i can't believe this is happening to me

i can't believe i actually let someone's words affect me.

ok this sounds crappy but i didn't realise those 'perfectionist die a hard death' and that CRAP actually became a little sickening irritating and condemned voice in my head.

i realised it while talking to a friend, and as usual my trend of thoughts flow and flow and suddenly my fingers stopped tying and my mind was telling myself that this way of thinking, thinking in this direction is WRONG!

WHAT THE HELL!

this has never happened to me before. what happened before was that after my trend of thoughts then i'll question the credibility and other possibilities. but never in my whole entire miserable life have i even questioned my trend of thoughts. questioned my way of thinking.

and now i'm actually doubting myself?!

why in the world did it even affect me?! you see now Zephyris? you see what i'm talking about now? i'm really sorry that i suddenly called you in the middle of no time and used that horrible tone at you... just sorry.

seriously i can't believe i let someone get to me, or 'psycho-ed' me. the last time it happened was when i was primary 5. is this my fault? IS THIS MY FAULT?!

IS THIS WAY OF THINKING EVEN WRONG IN THE FIRST PLACE? IF IT IS, THEN BILL GATES, ALBERT EINSTEIN, AND ALL THE C TYPE PERSONALITY PEOPLE FROM THE DISC PERSONALITY CLASSIFICATION DESERVE TO DIE LIKE ME?!

i'm seriously lost now. Raiin, please please a thousand please come back.

ok, i've read your blog Zeph, and thanks for the support you gave me. and thanks for a lot of stuffs in fact. and yeah i remembered that emoti... surprisingly your emoticons are always the root of me laughing until my guts hurts! gosh.... and yes, instead of using voodoo we should probably aim for a better power. but seriously.... do you think i need to even use 'burasto ban'? because i find that 'burasto ban', yes it's ultimate, but i lose one turn! and one more thing... seriously... i think 'kaehosha' should be enough. or maybe just 'daimonji'. i don't think 'neppu' or 'obahito' would even be needed...

then if it were you? what will you be using? wait... which one are you in the first place? same as me? or somone else? Bomanda? Shawazu?

Zeph, now you know. i not just need Raiin, Shiyuki and all those 'remedies' for us. i also need a particular technique...

Shuou, Ayame, Sotenkishunn, Watashi wa kyozetsu suru!

.~*^Twilight Ring^*~.: